Frumpy State of Mind

 
Yesterday afternoon I was in a funk.  Filled with mixed emotions that had been building up inside me all day: a dash of depression, a tablespoon of anxiety and a whole cup full of frumpiness.  Now Webster's online dictionary defines this as, "dowdy, drab" and Urban Dictionary.com defines frumpy as, "A female with lack of concern for appearance.  Often characterized by sweatpants, frizzy hair, gramma panties and a paisty complexion".  This last definition makes me laugh - I suppose insecurities in my appearance did play into a small part of my frumpiness.  My frumpiness however, is how I describe myself when I'm feeling all anxious, tight, slightly nauseous but craving chocolate and completely scattered and on the verge of tears.  

 (Whaaaaa--aaaa--)

Does anyone else ever feel this way?  No one particular event sparked this feeling, it slowly arrived at my door, snowballing as the day went on until it became apparent to my husband (who has x-ray vision into my heart and insides by the way - it can be SUPER frustrating sometimes when I just want to HIDE).

So hubby wanted me to share with him what was going on, as usual I really couldn't put my feelings succinctly into words and told him I couldn't because I'd probably start crying and I needed to go pick the boys (McGee & my nephew) from Vacation Bible School and didn't need wondering glances from others at my freshly-cried face.  Wonderful hubby that he is, he said he'd pick the boys up so I could cry or do whatever I needed to feel better and then we'd talk when he got home.  

A few minutes after he left the phone rang and it was him suggesting I get out some paper and write down all of those things that were overwhelming me and that maybe it would help me unload the burden some.  HELLO - genius!  He also thought it would help me to be able to share it with him better later.  


Right away I sat down to this task and was amazed as I wrote out each concern, responsibility, task and thought that was running through my mind and squeezing my insides, with each line my hubby was right!  My burden was lifted, the anxiety and fear were released from me and my perspective and attitude, which were not of the "loving happy wife and mom" genre, quickly changed and became healthier and more balanced.

What a simple task - writing down your fears, your worries, your regrets.  I had no idea it would have such a healing and encouraging effect on me!  Am I the only one who gets overwhelmed with the responsibilities, distractions and options that the world offers and requires of women/mothers/wives/daughters/friends?  If you are feeling overwhelmed or "frumpy", I encourage you to take my hubby's advice and write it all down and I hope it will help you as it has helped me.


Even better, take the advice of Beth Moore, renowned Bible teacher and author, in her "Believing God" workbook:

"We have never been more fragmented or lived in a society that demanded more pieces of us.  How can a person who is giving a thousand pieces of herself to innumerable demands and desires ever know wholeness?  The Lord Jesus Christ offers us the one and only way to wholeness: giving ourselves wholly to Him, inviting His healing, and trusting Him to apportion our energies, gifts and talents in their most effective ways.  Every fish.  Every loaf.  Withholding nothing.  We give Christ our all.  And with it He does the impossible."

Christ IS all we need.

Interestingly enough, when hubby arrived home from VBS and took a look at my list (front and back) he laughed sweetly and said, "Only YOU would take writing out your feelings and make it into a "to do" list of things to check off.  My little multi-tasker."  It's true - but what a great list to start checking off!  Already today there are 3 things checked off and I gave the day to Christ and didn't feel the slightest bit "frumpy".

Wishing you a BLESSED and FRUMPY-FREE weekend!

My last post was about sports and soccer and the athletic dreams we had for our children.

I say had because those were our dreams before having children and now that we are  parents we care much more about our children finding their interests, their strengths and their place in this world more than having them live up to our expectations of them.

In fact, it's quite fun seeing their personalities emerging, growing and changing and making guesses at what their possible professions will be.  They both are very musical - will they become musicians, dancers or singers?  McGee is very mechanical and analytical - will he become an engineer or inventor?  Miss Em loves to be goofy and make people laugh - is their life as a stand-up comedian or entertainer in her future?  McGee is extremely caring and nurturing and loves to take care of people - will he be a doctor or nurse?  Miss Em is drawn to animals and mothering - will she become a veterinarian?

We have no idea what their futures hold (and it's probably better that way), but here are some of the expectations and hopes we DO wish for our children:

- accepting Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior, loving and serving Him with their whole hearts

- loving others and living by the Golden Rule (you know, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."?)

- finding a career they enjoy and can work hard at while glorifying God

- marrying a Bible-believing husband/wife that will cherish and adore them, with a marriage that will weather the ups and downs of life as a testament to their faith and love

- having respect for authority and honesty in their words and deeds

- respecting and obeying their parents (us!) and building us a lovely retirement home in their backyard (just kidding....sort of). :)

I'm sure there are other more, but those are just the few that are tumbling out of my mind at the moment.  What hopes or expectations do you have for your children?  Were there expectations your parents had for you?  Do you think they were good or bad and did you live up to them?  I'm interested and would love to hear about it in the comments.

It is Finished

"Jesus knew that he had now finished His work.  And in order to make the Scriptures come true, he said, 'I am thirsty!'  A jar of cheap wine was there.  Someone then soaked a sponge with the wine and held it up to Jesus' mouth on the stem of a hyssop plant.  After Jesus drank the wine, he said, 'Everything is done!'  He bowed his head and died." - John 19:28-30

What's it all about?

It's not the eggs.  Not the pretty, frilly dresses or pastel colors.  Not even the bunnies and chocolate.  Nope, Easter is all about the grave...the empty grave mind you, and the glorious hope that we have knowing Christ died for our sins and was raised from the dead.

I was raised remembering our special Easter baskets and Easter egg hunts, both at church and at home (either ours or some family members).  I always loved Easter, the fresh Spring air and colors, family gathered together, the fun egg hunt and these delicious peanut butter cupcakes that we seemed to have most years.  I'm hoping my children will always love Easter as well.

We haven't done Easter baskets for the kids in years past.  Honestly I didn't even think about it as they were so young still, but this year as they are nearing 2 and 4 years old I've decided to get them some special little Easter gifts and put them in baskets we have around the house. 

For Miss Em she will receive a new little foam Princess book, some eggs with candies and a new little Easter bonnet hat.

McGee will be receiving a new Noah puzzle piece book and a couple other books about characters from the Bible (Zaccheus & Samson) that I picked up at a thrift store for 50 cents each.  He will also receive some eggs with candy.

We don't have any real traditions yet, but we'll be enjoying an Easter egg hunt at a park on Monday with our Mom's Group friends, hoping to dye some eggs this week and we've been enjoying reading our Easter book and trying to help the kids understand why we are celebrating Easter and the Good News it brings (salvation).

It's amazing really how simple it is to receive salvation - young children understand and can comprehend it so easily and yet so many adults try to make it so complicated, distrust it or outright choose against it.  A tragic loss for them (and the Kingdom of God).  Are you celebrating the real reason for Easter this year or just the fun to be had with eggs, bunnies and loads of chocolate?

I'm linking up today to Frugal Easter Eggstravaganza to see what other savvy bloggers are doing for family traditions and celebrations this Easter.

Mommy's Heart Tonight

The last few weeks have been draining as a mom caring for her family during a time filled with illness.  Miss Em first had an ear infection, then a urinary tract infection, cut her finger and spent time in the ER and most recently had a cold and is currently dealing with some bout of stomach flu.  McGee had a nasty cough and cold last week and the stomach flu this week.  Ben (our dog) sliced his paw and required a vet visit where we also found out he had a pretty bad ear infection.  Add to that laryngitis for me and the stomach flu for Daddy and I as well.

Much of my time has been spent holding my babies, listening to whining, crying, administering medications and cleaning up mess after mess of the stomach flu, while also still trying to keep our household semi-clean and put together and meals on the table.  Middle of the night wake-ups have kept us all tired and we have had more cartoons on then probably the last 2 years combined.  I have had moments of frustration at having both children crying for Mommy, wanting me to hold them at the exact same time, but not wanting to have me hold them both.  What is a mother to do?

Be thankful.  And grateful.  That's right, I'm thankful for these last few weeks, the extra time spent cuddling, and the ability to be home here with my babies instead of working and worrying about them from a desk.  Grateful that ear & urinary tract infections, colds, flu bugs and cuts are all that my family is facing and that besides those, we are relatively healthy, have a home to live in, clothes and blankets to keep us warm, food to keep us fed, friends to make us laugh and family that loves us. 

Tim Timmons, singer/songwriter and worship leader for Mariners Church in Irvine, CA is a young husband and father and was diagnosed with Carcinoid cancer, an extremely rare and incurable disease six years ago.  His song, "The Grateful" has been a favorite of Daddy and mine since we first heard it.  You may be able to hear it here.  These lyrics speak from my heart tonight:

Each day, you've given, each debt, forgiven,

Each breath, these are a gift from you

Our hearts, are filled with, the joy, of your goodness,

This thanks, we want to give to you

We are the grateful, we sing of your love, we sing of your mercy,

We are the grateful, the grateful ones.

We are the grateful, we sing of your power, we sing of your kindness,

We are the grateful, the grateful ones.  The grateful ones.

You have created, bought back, and remade us,

Redeemed, all for your glory God

So like those before us, singing, this chorus,

We join, the song of unending praise

We are the grateful, we sing of your love, we sing of your mercy,

We are the grateful, the grateful ones.

We are the grateful, we sing of your power, we sing of your kindness,

We are the grateful, the grateful ones.  The grateful ones.

After reading about poor Layla Grace and especially this post from her mother, my heart is breaking for them as I imagine how impossibly difficult it would be to endure losing my own Miss Em, who is about the same age as Layla Grace.  My thankfulness and gratefulness is deepened.

Earlier today I read this post from A High and Noble Calling and was convicted thinking of how many selfish desires I have and how little time I've spent with God these last couple of weeks.  I could have gained strength through time with Him, I would have been encouraged, given wisdom to make wise decisions and patience for the frustrating moments, but instead I indulged during my "me time" in "vegging out" in front of the television and putting off my Bible study.  

Don't get me wrong, God has actually given me lots of patience these last couple of weeks, kept me strengthened, happy and enjoying the time with my babies, but it never hurts to recognize your weaknesses, your failures and look forward to what God has for you when you spend time with Him.  Hope for the woman I can be with deeper relationship with Him, joy that God is never far and always available, and a heart FULL of thankfulness and gratefulness for ALL of our many blessings and the incredible husband and children God has entrusted to me.

“Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus.  Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:12-14