Friday, July 30, 2010

Frumpy State of Mind

Yesterday afternoon I was in a funk.  Filled with mixed emotions that had been building up inside me all day: a dash of depression, a tablespoon of anxiety and a whole cup full of frumpiness.  Now Webster's online dictionary defines this as, "dowdy, drab" and Urban defines frumpy as, "A female with lack of concern for appearance.  Often characterized by sweatpants, frizzy hair, gramma panties and a paisty complexion".  This last definition makes me laugh - I suppose insecurities in my appearance did play into a small part of my frumpiness.  My frumpiness however, is how I describe myself when I'm feeling all anxious, tight, slightly nauseous but craving chocolate and completely scattered and on the verge of tears.  


Does anyone else ever feel this way?  No one particular event sparked this feeling, it slowly arrived at my door, snowballing as the day went on until it became apparent to my husband (who has x-ray vision into my heart and insides by the way - it can be SUPER frustrating sometimes when I just want to HIDE).

So hubby wanted me to share with him what was going on, as usual I really couldn't put my feelings succinctly into words and told him I couldn't because I'd probably start crying and I needed to go pick the boys (McGee & my nephew) from Vacation Bible School and didn't need wondering glances from others at my freshly-cried face.  Wonderful hubby that he is, he said he'd pick the boys up so I could cry or do whatever I needed to feel better and then we'd talk when he got home.  

A few minutes after he left the phone rang and it was him suggesting I get out some paper and write down all of those things that were overwhelming me and that maybe it would help me unload the burden some.  HELLO - genius!  He also thought it would help me to be able to share it with him better later.  

Right away I sat down to this task and was amazed as I wrote out each concern, responsibility, task and thought that was running through my mind and squeezing my insides, with each line my hubby was right!  My burden was lifted, the anxiety and fear were released from me and my perspective and attitude, which were not of the "loving happy wife and mom" genre, quickly changed and became healthier and more balanced.

What a simple task - writing down your fears, your worries, your regrets.  I had no idea it would have such a healing and encouraging effect on me!  Am I the only one who gets overwhelmed with the responsibilities, distractions and options that the world offers and requires of women/mothers/wives/daughters/friends?  If you are feeling overwhelmed or "frumpy", I encourage you to take my hubby's advice and write it all down and I hope it will help you as it has helped me.

Even better, take the advice of Beth Moore, renowned Bible teacher and author, in her "Believing God" workbook:
"We have never been more fragmented or lived in a society that demanded more pieces of us.  How can a person who is giving a thousand pieces of herself to innumerable demands and desires ever know wholeness?  The Lord Jesus Christ offers us the one and only way to wholeness: giving ourselves wholly to Him, inviting His healing, and trusting Him to apportion our energies, gifts and talents in their most effective ways.  Every fish.  Every loaf.  Withholding nothing.  We give Christ our all.  And with it He does the impossible."

Christ IS all we need.

Interestingly enough, when hubby arrived home from VBS and took a look at my list (front and back) he laughed sweetly and said, "Only YOU would take writing out your feelings and make it into a "to do" list of things to check off.  My little multi-tasker."  It's true - but what a great list to start checking off!  Already today there are 3 things checked off and I gave the day to Christ and didn't feel the slightest bit "frumpy".

Wishing you a BLESSED and FRUMPY-FREE weekend!


  1. That definition from urban dictionary is hilarious!! I loved your suggestion; what a great idea. I went through a book study once and it said to write down in 4 columns what you are Happy, Sad, Angry, or Worried about. That helped me too although I always forget to do that :) Hope today is better for you!! :)

  2. Aw! What an awesome husband....and a great idea! I get that way too sometimes though. My nana used to say "Well that's just the devil!" (in her southern accent), but sometimes I think physiologically the type A-ers can get overwhelmed. I started writing a blog post about all the things that consume my mind each day and then decided not to post it because I was afraid it would freak people out! :) Glad you felt better...praying today is frumpyfree!

  3. I have had "frumpy" feelings and appearance more times than I would like to admit. Getting my feelings down has always helped me. Thank goodness for my blog. That coupled with plenty of prayer, wonderful friends and/or family are how I make it through the day. It's the really bad days that warrant wearing the granny panties. Yeah...that's right I said it. LOL

  4. Sooo having one of those days today. Thanks for your encouragement and the Beth Moore quote. Love the pics, too. That's how i feel!

  5. What an encouragement to read all of your comments and know I'm not alone! Thank you.