Not Me! Monday

Boy has it been a week around the Sunshine House!  I think I may break the record this week for most "Not Me!" moments.  As usual, this is a combination of "Not Me!" as well as "Not My Children!" Monday.  This blog carnival was started by MckMama, but I don't think she's participating today as she and her husband are in Kenya this week with Compassion International.

Let's just go ahead and call this last week the Week of Destruction.  Read on and you'll see why.

 - Miss Em did NOT find a bottle of purple craft paint I had planned on returning to Michael's and she definitely did NOT proceed to pour it's entirety on our coffee table and living room carpet.  Although clean-up was swift our coffee table was NOT left with a large round section stripped of stain and a portion of the table does NOT have purple paint etched all in it's crevices.  I do NOT foresee a sanding and re-staining session in my near future to restore our table that has been around since I was a child.

 - Later in the same day I did NOT notice some odd redness to Miss Em's cheek and then again while changing her diaper, some redness on her stomach, curious I investigated a bit and certainly did NOT find that she had gotten into my toiletries and broken off and smeared strawberry chapstick all over our bedroom carpet.  You know, the kind that has oils in it and doesn't come out?

 - If you were in Winco Saturday and saw a woman dressed in a black turtleneck sweater, dark wash jeans and black ballet flats, trying to maneuver a defective shopping cart filled with groceries, a toddler and a pre-schooler, that woman was certainly NOT me.  Furthermore, if you happened to be blinded by the light pink socks she was wearing (thanks to borrowed socks at a My Gym birthday party she was too lazy to take off for grocery shopping) - DON'T blame me because that was NOT me!  And if you noticed that same woman rushing to the bathroom with kids in tow and leaving behind a cashier to ring up all her groceries, all because her near-4 year-old needed to go "NOW!", then well...you got it, that WASN'T me!  Sidenote:  Many thanks to the mom in line behind this woman who told her she could take her son to the bathroom and the cashier would just hold the total for her to pay later, assuring her she had done this before too.  What a relief this mom must have felt (and her son too)!

Back to the destruction that befell the Sunshine House this week -

 - A mysterious small hole was NOT found at toddler height in the drywall near the door out to the garage.  Miss Em was NOT found poking her little finger in this hole, although I don't see how she could have created it.

 - After walking toward's McGee's room with a little metal toy car, Miss Em was NOT later heard flushing the toilet and when I found her ans asked where the car was she did NOT point to the toilet and say, "In there."  Although undiscovered so far, this car may or may NOT be to blame for the toilet NOT backing up and overflowing a couple of times.

 - Two favorite shirts of Miss Em's were NOT ruined thanks to her artistic pursuits with the above mentioned paint and getting into Mommy's permanent scrapbooking pens.

 - While socializing and eating, enjoying a delightful princess tea party for my 3 year old niece's birthday, Mommy did NOT drop a giant dollop of whipped cream and strawberries from her pavlova down the front of her, complete with whipping cream in her hair, necklace and black sweater.  I absolutely, positively NEVER drop food down the front of me (and my parents don't either...hee, hee).

 - Ben (our dog) would NEVER dig a hole in the drywall of our bedroom.  For whatever reason, our well behaved dog certainly DIDN'T do that!

- In a hurried rush to get laundry in, dinner going, photos downloaded and kids entertained, I did NOT accidentally include Daddy's new Merino Wool argyle vest in with the rest of the darks.  Upon folding the clothes out of the dryer later that night I did NOT find a miniature McGee-sized version of that same sweater vest.  While apologizing to Daddy about the demise of his new favorite vest, I absolutely, positively did NOT laugh, nor giggle at how much the vest had shrunk and how cute it was.  Seriously - I thought these things only happened in movies. :)

 - Here's a little quiz for you:

While I was making dinner - A) my computer did NOT have a "critical error" that required attention (so afraid it had crashed!), B)  McGee did NOT decide to take out every single book and toy in his room and pile it on the floor so as to create a barricade in front of the door, C) The clothes dryer, with a precious dress I did not want to wrinkle, did NOT go off numerous times to tell me to take the clothes out and fold them, D)  The toilet did NOT overflow again, or E)  All of the above ?

If you chose E then you are one smartypants!

 - Finally, Daddy did NOT receive a "pink slip", aka layoff notice, on Friday.  The State of California would NEVER get themselves into such financial disrepair that our children and their futures will be suffering greatly with such high student/teacher ratios and meager resources.