Not Me! Monday

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Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. Her sweet son Stellan is in the hospital (and could use your prayers) so she won’t be hosting Not Me! Monday, but I decided to post mine anyway. Each week seems to start slow and I think, “Guess I’ll skip Not Me! Monday this week” and then BAM! - lots of embarrassing, catastrophic (at least to me), silly things start to happen!

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- I was putting my new pair of contacts in this morning, first the left eye, then the right, as I do every morning. My vision continued to be blurry though so I took the right one out twice, cleaned it and replaced it only to have blurry vision still. I almost tossed the pair, but couldn’t stomach throwing out a new pair and wasting the money. Then it dawned on me – NO actually, it DIDN’T dawn on me, NO WAY would I accidentally put two contacts in my right eye and none in my left! The effects of sleep deprivation I’m sure!

- While getting my kids dressed this morning I did NOT decide to put Miss Em in a sweet light yellow top and pretty white sweater. A couple of hours later while tasting samples at Costco I did NOT then allow her to sample some Pomegranate Blueberry juice and she definitely did NOT proceed to dump the entire cup of juice over her head and all down her back, including the pretty white sweater and light yellow shirt. I did NOT stand their laughing at her and the ridiculousness of it all, then look around sheepishly and borrow some paper towels from the taste table guy. Oh the joys of stain removal!

- It was a morning rush madness, making cupcakes and trying to run out the door to meet a friend. With the cupcakes packed and finally all set to go and only running about 15 minutes late (sense the sarcasm), I DIDN’T dash back to my room to change into a clean shirt and hear, “Mommy – I had an accident.” I DIDN’T say, “Why didn’t you go to the bathroom?” and hear, “No I had an accident with the cupcakes.” My heart did NOT drop and I DIDN’T run out to the kitchen to find one of the two containers of cupcakes upside down on the floor. When I opened it up and noticed only some of the cupcakes and asked where the rest of them were, McGee DIDN’T say, “They’re on the floor.” I DIDN’T toss the fallen cupcakes in the garbage, give McGee a thorough reprimand and quickly try to salvage the smashed cupcakes and frost some new ones. When McGee got up from his time out chair to show me he had a bloody nose my first thought was NOT, “Did I give him such a harsh reprimand that emotionally it traumatized him and caused a bloody nose?” Nope – I ‘m NEVER overcome with mother’s guilt!

- I absolutely did NOT allow my husband to eat canned soup for his birthday dinner! NO way this loving, nurturing wife would do that!

- After an exciting first half of the 49er game and the 49ers going in halftime BEATING the Colts and holding Peyton Manning & the Colt’s offense to only field goals, I did NOT fall asleep shortly into the second ½ where the 49ers ended up losing. Later after watching the highlights I did NOT tell my husband, “It’s all my fault – if I hadn’t fallen asleep maybe their offense wouldn’t have fallen asleep as well!” No, I NEVER think silly things like that!

Well I guess that’s all I can think of for now. I didn’t remember to write anything down all week (in my spare time – ha ha!) so this is all I can pull from memory at the moment, but I’m pretty sure there are probably a few other good Not Me moments that it’s probably best I’ve forgotten. Have a blessed week!